Social Skills Goals

Here is a list of some Social Skills goals that can be used for the IEP (it is not a complete list, but it will at least give you some ideas). Determine what your child needs help in most and pick only a few to address in one year.


Nonverbal behaviors: appropriate eye contact, social distance, voice volume and tone, facial expressions, listen and speaking positions, use gestures and facial expressions appropriately, understand the relevance of Prosody (the change in tone, inflection or emphasis on certain words) when listening to the speech of the other person

Friendship skills: greeting others, joining a group, taking turn, sharing, negotiating and compromising, following group rules, understanding the qualities of a good friend

Friendship Management: informal verses formal behavior, respecting personal boundaries, respecting others opinions, sharing a friend, getting attention in positive ways, offering help, when to tell on someone, not to tell people what to do if they don’t follow the rules, modesty, asking someone out on a date, appropriate touch, dealing with peer pressure, dealing with rumors, calling a friend on the phone, answering the phone, being a good listener, keeping secrets

Conversation skills: introducing yourself, starting, maintaining, and ending a conversation, taking turns talking, commenting, asking others questions, expressing interest in others, choosing appropriate topics, how and when to interrupt, staying on topic, shifting topics, tone of voice, introducing topics of interests to others, asking a question when you don’t understand, saying “I don’t know”, sensitive topics, accepting and complementing others, not talking too long, greetings, getting to know someone new, giving background information to what you are saying, refrain from speaking about his/her obsessions, not making irrelevant comments during a conversation, use appropriate repair strategies to inform the listener of the need for additional information, change the topic or style of a conversation to suit the listener, not make comments that are blunt or rude

Cooperative play skills: asking someone to play, joining others in play, compromising, sharing, taking turns, playing a game, dealing with loosing, dealing with winning, ending a play activity

Understanding thoughts and feelings: showing empathy, taking others’ perspectives, handling difficult emotions, cheering up a friend

Social problem solving and conflict management: coping with being told “no”, being left out, asserting yourself, dealing with teasing, avoiding being “set up, giving criticism in a positive way, accepting criticism, having a respectful attitude, offer and accept suggestions, avoid and end social interactions, avoid, recognize, and resolve conflicts

Self-awareness: learning about autism spectrum disorders, personal strengths, unique differences, self-acceptance, notice the behaviors of himself/herself, recognize the effects of his actions on others and to change his behavior accordingly

Maintain self control: recognizing feelings, dealing with making a mistake, staying calm, trying when work is hard, trying something new, problem solving, talking to others when upset, dealing with family problems, understanding anger, not incessantly ask questions to seek reassurance when something will happen, not repeat information over and over again and be able to know when to be quiet, demonstrate self-awareness by labeling his feelings correctly